All The Times I Have Been to the Emergency Room

Yesterday, I was at Marin General and it made me start reminiscing about all the times I’ve been to the hospital/emergency room. Here are all my personal trips to the ER (not counting when I accompanied someone else), as I can think of them:

  • Shattering my teeth in the mall parking lot (a classic, obviously)
  • Biting through my lip when I accidentally slammed a weight-lifting bar into my face — which was also a key part of my Best Week Ever
  • Knocking out my front tooth in college at a pick-up soccer game
  • Hitting a curb and my bike in my first-ever mini-practice triathlon, which caused a concussion and a not-a-seizure
  • Passing out in the training room in high school, after getting hit in the face with a medicine ball, and having a not-a-seizure
  • (I can’t remember if we actually went to the emergency room or just to the doctor either 1. the time I slept-walked in the middle of the night in high school and dove off my bed into my bookshelf and then went back to sleep, or 2. the time I passed out from some weird combination of cold winter running/hot tub/shower, and hit my head on the kitchen floor when I fell. I do know that all those times prompted a whole rash of tests and visits to the Children’s Hospital.)
  • Falling off the slide in 5th grade (I think) and having a not-a-seizure
  • When they thought I had appendicitis in 3rd grade and were all set to take out my appendix, but then I mysteriously got better; memorable because we took a cab to the emergency room, which was the first time I’d ever been in a cab and it was quite exciting
  • Getting my thumb slammed in a door as a kid, and we weren’t sure if it was broken or not
  • Jumping off a pool backwards and slamming my chin into the cement — also the only time I’ve had to get stitches (which got infected and then I had to get more stitches)

I feel like I’m missing one and, obviously, there were plenty of other accidents and injuries that didn’t warrant an emergency room visit. But, as you can see, when I say I don’t need to go to the ER and it would be pointless, I know of what I speak.

2 thoughts on “All The Times I Have Been to the Emergency Room

  1. The dive off the bed into the bookcase did not merit an ER visit – the cut on your head had already sort of scabbed over (after bleeding all over the pillow). The cold weather/hot shower fall not-a-seizure took you to the ER in Georgetown, which freaked out the extended family. Wasn’t there more than the one visit in all those years of junior high and high school? Seems like there was something between smashing your chin on the side of the pool and slamming your thumb in the giant wooden door… didn’t you fall off the monkey bars onto your head in kindergarten at Altamonte Springs? But I don’t have a clear memory of the ER from that. I honestly don’t have a clear memory of the appendix cab ride either – maybe that was Dad? Good times.

    1. Yeah, Matt was with us in Kentucky and I think he found me on the floor of the kitchen. I didn’t go to the ER when I fell off the monkey bars (did after the fall off the slide), but there were a few other passing out episodes, like the one in the mountains, and a few soccer injuries, like the black eye concussion, that we didn’t go to the emergency room for.

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